Source: Edmonton Journal
We will soon be having a provincial election and I for one, do not want to return to the dark conservative backwater Alberta languished in for some 40 odd years. We have a New Democratic Party Government that, when situated on the political spectrum, comes up centrist or slightly left of centre. In Alberta this is pretty heady stuff. The UCP (United Conservative Party) is the cobbled up zombie corpse of the old Progressive Conservative party and the rural wack-a-loon Wild Rose Party (*shudder*). It has been stitched together by a greasy re-baked federal conservative pol named Jason Kenny.
The defining feature of the zombie UCP party platform is that it’s *NOT* the NDP and its debt inflating, male emasculating, poor people centring democratic socialism (not the “s” word…*faints*). In other words, these gormless fucks have sweet FA with regards to policy and what they would actually do if (’til now) they were elected to govern Alberta. Not much other than “not what the NDP is doing”. Sorry folks, the lame restatement of an antithesis is political weaksauce at best – but it might be enough to sway our lemming centric conservative voting populace, considering the rightward political leanings in this province. Apparently many Albertans have been longing for a return to the 40 year the conservative seppuku our province has recently emerged from. Social programs? Protections for workers? Government for the people? Climate responsibility?
Fuck that pinko communist noise.
I digress. The platform of the UCP is oozing out into the public’s knowledge and it isn’t pretty (see Ontario’s false populist doppelganger, Doug Ford for Kenney’s inspiration) . Most of the platform portends a merry jaunt to back to lining the pockets of the rich while proclaiming austerity for the lucky ones and a relentless shitcanning for everyone else.
“Kenney said the UCP will hire people to draft orders in council for cabinet to adopt the week it’s sworn in if the UCP wins. One of the key elements of structural reform, Kenney said, “is to move quickly.”
“Speed creates its own momentum. It also makes it harder for the opponents of reform to obstruct it,” he said.
Kenney said he doesn’t want to get “bogged down” with public consultation, so his party is doing as much as it can now “on the big issues.”
You know all that legislation to protect the working class and benefit the poor. It has to go. Stat. But more importantly we have to fuck the NDP’s social progress up with no debate, no consultation, and none of that fucking filthy democracy we fucking harp on when it comes to protecting business class interests and the rich.
“Kenney said the UCP would freeze minimum wage increases (the NDP recently increased it to $15 per hour). He would also consider restructuring the minimum wage to something that resembles the age-graduated system used in Australia, in which youth get paid less than adults.”
Because why pay young people reasonably? Who thought up that shit? Was it Stalin? Because the young most certainly don’t need money to live or save toward pursing post-secondary education (which will most certainly be gutted during a UCP regime – we need more beer guzzling dullards not egg-heads for christ’s sake). Screw the young people they vote for commies anyways, plus we can ratchet up poor peoples class antagonism so while they scrabble for the shiny pebbles we deem to throw their way, then we can continue the plunder-party for the corporate and business interests, as it rightfully should be. Added benefit: the poor will need to focus on mere survival instead of organizing for a just and equitable society… so much winning for everyone.
“The UCP would appoint a minister tasked solely with decreasing regulations by one-third as part of an “aggressive process of … lightening the regulatory burden on the Alberta economy,” Kenney said. That minister’s work would be guided by a similar setup under former B.C. Liberal premier Gordon Campbell.
“We’ll be constrained in how far we can go in terms of fiscal stimulus because of the $8-billion deficit and pending $60-billion debt, so we will need to over-compensate on the regulatory side,” he said.”
You know that idea about the government representing the best interests of the people of Alberta? That is about as red as Lenin’s underpants. Oversight and regulations are for weak kneed socialist chumps who don’t know the true power of the dark side reckless capitalist exploitation.
Climate change? Unions? Checks on corporate power? That malarkey needs to go, so much so that we’ll set up a supercharged “Fuck You I’ve got Mine” government ministry to expedite the whole fucking process.
Awesome!
“Kenney doubled down on his commitment to a well-resourced government “war room” to defend Alberta’s energy industry here and abroad, setting up satellite offices if need be.
He also pledged to “stop the statutory shutdown of coal.” Federal regulations passed under Kenney’s former government in 2012 would shutter most of Alberta’s 18 coal-fired plants. The remaining six have to close by 2030 under a deadline set by Alberta’s NDP government.”
You know that economic diversification program the NDP has been going on about? Trying to (after 40 years of conservative dithering) wean Alberta off fossil fuel extraction dependence? Let’s tear that initiative down. No.. let’s burn it to the ground with…*thinking*… COAL! Because no UCP government policy says ‘we understand the implications of climate science‘ more than’ lets ROLL COAL ALL DAY EVERY FUCKING DAY.
Awesome!
“Kenney said he would consider appointing a fiscal commission to make recommendations on how to get back to balance without raising taxes. A UCP platform would include a “positive vision” for artists and the cultural industries, he said, but “there will have to be a period of fiscal restraint.”
Arts? Culture? If its not drinking buck-a-beer while watching the idiot box then you’ve come to the wrong place effete liberal beatniks. Your highfalutin cultural activities have no place in at UCP province. We have no need to talk critically about our culture and converse about our place in the world, that kind of thinking promotes democratic ideals and free thought and that shit is bad for business.
Seriously folks, the UCP is ahead in fundraising and in the polls. It feels like Alberta is about to head back into the insipid MAGA zone. I don’t want that to happen. We’ve had a taste of what governing for the people is like, and should continue to support a government that isn’t solely on exploiting everything for the sake of the rich and business classes.
So how about it Alberta, can we not head back into the political dark ages, just this once?
3 comments
October 22, 2018 at 5:35 pm
bleatmop
The narrative the media is pushing is definitely grim. There are a few signs of light though. Notley’s approval rating has gone up drastically since her hard take on Trudeau after the pipeline fallout. The UCP also seems to have an endless stream of lake of fire moments since they have formed. There is also the population growth and strong immigrant population in Alberta that wasn’t here 15 years ago. These people don’t have 44 years of conditioning that somehow the conservatives are the only ones to elect into power. Finally there is the fact that the methodologies that are showing the UCP ahead in the polls are the same ones that gave Hillary Clinton a 100% chance to with the most recent presidential election (looking at you David Plouffe). Polls, especially vast popular support polls have been very suspect for quite some time now, partly because the idea of calling people’s landlines cuts out much of the under 55 crowd because we simply don’t keep landlines anymore. Internet polls tend to only represent a very narrow band of people (those who would actually take part in an internet poll). Also popular support across the province is not helpful. Many rural ridings show up 80%+ at election day. These result, while not outliers (because there are too many of them) do not help predict urban results which are typically more competitive.
So what do I think is going to happen? I think like last election, every riding that is actually rural will be a lock for the UCP. Even in the greatest disaster that could possibly happen for the UCP were to happen (something Akin to Kenney talking about how he hates rural hicks, thinks the Stampede is stupid and that he specifically bought a truck just to bait rural rubes into thinking he’s one of them) I think the UCP would still poll at a minimum of 55% at their lowest result in any rural riding.
Urban ridings are going to be tough. I think it’s going to be a riding by riding battle. I think Derek Fildebrandt is going to make a competitive showing in wherever he chooses to run but he will be edged out by about 1100 votes. I think the NDP will hold most of Edmonton and much of working class Calgary. Finally I think it will be all the small cities, such as Lethbridge, Red Deer and Grande Prairie that will be who decides who gets to govern. Unfortunately that leans heavily to the UCP’s favour.
Let’s hope someone catches Kenney on tape muttering to himself how he hates having to live in Alberta for the first time in his life and that he wishes he was back in his Ottawa Sky Palace with his cat. Video of him kicking a dog and smacking a pregnant lady holding a baby would help. Help, but certainly not guarantee any changes in the polls. The NDP would have to campaign hard to get traction on such weak dirt.
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October 23, 2018 at 5:57 pm
bleatmop
Lol, this might do it.
https://old.reddit.com/r/alberta/comments/9qqjho/leaked_letter_detailing_kenneys_involvement_with/
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October 26, 2018 at 11:43 am
The Arbourist
@Bleatmop
Dammit man, making me go all spit screen to reply. :)
I agree, but I also think that there is a critical mass of grey-hairs and soon to be grey hairs that are just itching to get these ‘bloody socialists’ out of power. The older cohorts tend to show up and vote more conservatively…although I’m not sure they understand that the conservative option this election is actually quite reactionary.
Another reason to confirm my dislike of all things ‘rural’.. :)
I can live with a minority government either way, but I’m hoping people have enough sense to see that Notley has been the best premier since Loughheed and this government has done a remarkable job of governing through absolute shite of economic times – keeping our GDP growing – and maintaining the public sector.
This election may get me into the orange ranks. I’m adamant that I do not wish exist under reactionary fuck-wit rule for the next 5 year.
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