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Working on holidays on campus is always a rewarding and edifying experience. I get to meet the upcoming best and brightest students that our fair institution produces for Alberta. However, the building I work at is closed today, as it is a long weekend holiday.
“But how Arbourist, are people getting into a locked building?” my inquisitive audience asks.
Good question padawan, I mostly blame the radio station that also shares this building as they have staff that is going in and out all the time. No big deal. However, the front doors were recently renovated and I think that whomever did the measuring did not have their morning coffee because they stop and stick just short of the locking mechanism.
Consistently.
I assume this is where the Grand Axis of the Universe managed to gain entry to my fair building. After using the facilities he and his partner were summarily greeted by yours truly and asked to kindly leave, as it was a holiday and the building was closed.
I swear, it was like I was in my dodge-ball days again, twisting and turning but now only verbally.
“Where am I supposed to study?”
“I have a study group to attend and I need a space to do so!”
“I pay for the operation of this building, why can’t I use it?”
“Is there anyway to withdraw my student union fees? I need to use the building and clearly I’m not being allowed.”
Now gentle reader, I have some time behind me in the service industry (not to mention special education), and dealing with assholes is a useful skill one acquires over the years. The important thing is to empathize, or at least appear to empathize with the AIQ’s (asshole in question) concerns, then offer useful alternatives, but maintain the message you need to get across, namely you my dear dear AIQ need to GTFO out of my building, post haste. The AIQ’s companion had obviously been down this road before, and she mouthed her apologies and resignedly shrugged as we exchanged glances. She smiled as I arched my eyebrow and rolled my eyes at AIQ’s entitlement fail.
They left, and I had to just stand for awhile and process the twerpitude that had just been performed for my benefit. It was inspiring to share the magnitude of the naive cluelessness of our dear AIQ. He genuinely felt wronged by the University for having the audacity to close the building on holiday weekend disrupting his study plans.
Boo-frakking-hoo.
AIQ is under the false assumption that the powers that be give a rats ass about his bullshite undergraduate work and that anything he produces during his undergrad counts for anything meaningful. You just do not understand how balls to bones sincere AIQ was, this was near life and death. The sheer magnitude of his whingeing set AIQ in a class all by himself (I hope). Stern letters, at the very least, would be written!
It was like the Ivy Tower educated snob stereotype anti-intellectuals like to paint came to life and manifested all the bullshite priggish entitlement crap that makes the average person cranky.
I do like to think of myself as a intellectual (of sorts), and therefore I offer an apology for AIQ’s behaviour as I now can understand the need to throttle people who actually act like this.
Allan! Allan!
BUFFALO, N.Y. – Border agents say a New York man tried to explain away the ankle monitor he was wearing while returning from Canada by claiming it was a show of support for actress Lindsay Lohan.
Customs and Border Protection officers say they found the bracelet around Eugene Todie’s ankle July 9 after he tried to re-enter the United States using someone else’s passport. They say he’s on probation and not supposed to leave the country.
Full marks for being creative.
No so full marks for breaking your parole and lying to the border control people, asshat.
July 3rd has come and gone, and I was unaware such an auspicious occasion. I was, as Canadians often are, left out of the loop of all things cool and meaningful that happen on the intertoobz. I did however manage to steal find this cartoon… (see all the entries including the one below here).
Just wait till next year.
Apple products irk me to no end. They define the non-generative end of the technology spectrum. If Apple does not like your application it simply will not work on your ‘iwhatever’ (flash being a case in point). Apple seems to have dropped the ball again in one of their strong suits: design. (But it does blend well, a point in Apple’s favour.)
“Apple has acknowledged reception problems with its new iPhone 4, but the company is blaming the issue on how users are holding the device.
The new iPhone, which went on sale in several countries on Thursday, features an antenna built into the frame of the device itself. Some users immediately complained of losing reception, which prompted Apple to address the issue late Thursday.”
Huh. Well damn, I guess you just have to stop holding the phone to get good reception. But really, do you buy an Apple product for anything more than just to be seen with it. Functionality seems a distant second, at best. So what if the darn thing cannot pick up a signal, its an Apple and to be seen ‘using’ one should be enough.
‘Apple’s chief executive Steve Jobs further addressed the issue in an email to a user, which was posted on the Engadget website on Friday. The user wrote to complain about the problem, to which Jobs responded: “Just avoid holding it that way.”
I do like a good getaway chase. This must have been high drama, weaving through traffic, changing lanes, going 7 km/h. The CBC reports the following:
Perhaps the felon thought no one would notice someone driving a lawn tractor down the street.
KENNEWICK, Wash. – Police say they caught a man making a slow getaway on a stolen riding mower.
The Tri-City Herald reports officers in Washington state responding to a burglary call Tuesday morning found a 31-year-old man riding the mower in the street, pulling a trailer of other lawn care equipment.
He was jailed for investigation of burglary, theft and drug charges.
Leave it to the those wacky Japanese toy manufacturers to happily sashay over the expected norms of decency, common sense and appropriateness.
Check out the awesome Russian Roulette Gun Game: if you lose you only get kicked in the head with a hippo as opposed to having your brains splattered on the wall. Oh what fun!
Please excuse the ‘host’ as he seemingly has a internet business to run and shamelessly plugs himself throughout the entire video.
bleatmop
Mystro
The Arbourist
Dead Wild Roses 
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