My view is that gender is no more real than Victorian ectoplasm, or creationism.
It’s nothing more than an idea that some people hold, one that they are determined to press onto others.

And I think people don’t often enough understand that it exists to GROUP PEOPLE into CATEGORIES based on shared traits.
It’s right there in the root of the word.

Gender = group with shared traits

But people who push the concept of gender now try to make it be two opposing things at once, like a shoe they claim can fit on both feet at the same time.

If you ask them directly what it means, this is what you are told.

First they say gender is an individual, indefinable, intimately personal and subjective thing. It’s different for everybody, no-one is the same. My personal, bespoke, made to measure shoe.

And then, barely drawing breath, they tell me that it encircles an entire group and excludes another; a very distinct class, a group. One that must be recognised by its single communal name.

And when you ask, if it is unique and personal to you, then why am I in this class with you? What are our shared traits that make us a class, yet exclude those others? What is it you think you see in ME that is making you pull me into this idea you have of YOU?

They answer, we cannot tell you these traits we share, but you must stay in this class with us. And we must share the same name. Or, if you are one of the very, very few, you can leave and join that class over there. But we cannot tell you what their shared traits are too. You must decide, you are us or you are them, but there are no criteria we can tell you so that you know which is which. You will feel it inside you.

And this makes no sense. And you sense there is a lie here, a truth being hidden.

And you begin to notice that when they are unguarded, they let things slip. I knew from a child that I was a ….because I liked…..I always wanted to be a …..because I felt….because I wanted…

And the picture of what they really think the shared traits of these groups are begins to take shape, and you understand why most genderbelievers don’t want to answer directly. The things they liked, and felt, and wanted are all stereotypes. Expectations and rules and behaviours and fashions and feelings. And all of them attached, needlessly, to a very, very distinct group that really does have tangible shared traits. Attached to a biological SEX. And the word the genderbelievers are using to describe their gender; these wants and likes and rules and feelings, is also the word used for sex.

So you say, oh wow, I get it, I understand what you want, and you can have it! In fact, it’s ALL yours, all that stuff, I never really wanted it. Take the gender stuff, and like a metaphorical 6 inch heel, hot pink, patent leather spike stiletto, go ahead and put it on your own foot, I’ll be much more comfortable without it, in fact. Take the stuff, but please just detach it from my sex. Have it, but please, leave me the word for my sex, for my body, so we don’t confuse the two things, SEX and GENDER, any more. The shoe is all yours, not mine and good luck to you.

And they say, No way.

They need my foot too. It has to be squashed into that shoe alongside their own foot. My sex, my body, the thing I cannot change, squashed uncomfortably into that gender shoe, with their sex, their body, and both of us under the same name. The name that used to mean my sex. And we won’t talk about our sexes or our bodies any more, we’ll just talk about the single shoe that both our feet are crammed into.

So that’s gender, and that’s why I hate it, and all the lies and obfuscation around it. It’s a stupid, uncomfortable shoe that everyone would do better to throw in the bin, but which has instead become the thing that I am forced to wear if I am to have words to talk about my sex. It has become the thing I always hated that I am ordered to share with people with whom I have nothing in common. It hurts, I want my foot out of it, I can run better without it.

I want to be barefoot. The way I was born.

Barracker