I haven’t been blogging these last couple of weeks because Fran, my mother, had to go to the hospital. She had an persistent UTI, which upon further investigation at the University of Alberta Hospital also coincided with a pneumonia. Fran was already suffering from the damage of two previous heart attacks along with atrial fibrillation and diabetes.

On Friday March 5th Fran had just come out of ICU she had stabilized and was in the regular care rooms, my visits on that Friday and Saturday were hopeful as she seemed to have stabilized and was beginning the road to recovery.

Late Sunday night the situation drastically changed. All of her vitals plunged and she was rushed back to ICU. I was not called until early Monday morning. My girlfriend Tara and myself rushed to the ICU where Fran’s doctors outlined the situation and then had the ‘you need to sit-down’ talk.
Fran was barely responding to the highest levels of medicine to keep her blood pressure up and antibiotics to quell the pneumonia and now septic infection that was ravaging her body. Everything that could be done, had been done. Her body was simply overwhelmed and a systemic cascade of organ failure had begun.
Fran was disconnected from life support at 2:55pm, Monday March 8th. She was not conscious or lucid (I don’t think), but I spoke with her, held her hand and told her that she was loved and her pets were safe.
Fran’s vital ceased at 3:00pm. She passed calmly with dignity and in the presence of her family.
——
Today I awoke and went to the living room. I sat on the couch and looked out the window. That’s Fran’s car behind our still winter slept tree.

I could think of nothing to do. So I put on Mozart’s Requiem in D minor and listened and remembered all I could about my Mom’s life and started to grieve over her passing. Please honour her passing as I did with the last movement, the Communio from the Requiem. It begins at 41:46 in the video.
Communio – Lux aeterna
Lux aeterna luceat eis, Domine,
cum sanctis mis in aeternum,
quia pius es.
Requiem aeternam dona eis, Domine,
et lux perpetua luceat eis,
cum sanetis tuis in aeternum,
quia plus es.
May eternal light shine on them, O Lord.
with Thy saints for ever, because
Thou art merciful.
Grant the dead eternal rest, O Lord,
and may perpetual light shine on them,
with Thy saints for ever,
because Thou are merciful.
Her cat Angel came and sat with me for the entire requiem. She knew.

I am lost without words.
(Thus, I am taking a bit of break from blogging. Know that I have my Tara and my family supporting me through this time. Thank you all for commemorating with me Fran’s life, it’s the best one can hope for in these Covid times.)




8 comments
March 9, 2021 at 11:55 am
Carmen
Oh, Arb. So sorry . .
LikeLiked by 1 person
March 9, 2021 at 12:07 pm
Steve Ruis
I am glad you got to be there. I do not know how aware we are when we are dying but I tend to think the presence of loved ones is a comfort as we pass away.
I was there for my mother in her final moments, father too and it is a kind of blessing given to be there. It helps us understand and appreciate and feel the loss (the only way out from sadness is “through” so don’t back away from your grief).
It has been years for me but I still commune with my memories of my parents often enough. They were always there for me . . . and still are.
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March 9, 2021 at 1:15 pm
omegaphallic
My Condolences
LikeLiked by 1 person
March 9, 2021 at 3:16 pm
silverapplequeen
My deepest condolences.
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March 9, 2021 at 5:05 pm
Bob Browning
… I have a clue what it’s like. We buried my Mother this January 21st, her birthday for 91 years.
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March 10, 2021 at 5:03 am
john zande
told her that she was loved and her pets were safe
Those, Arb, are the sweetest and most meaningful words anyone could ever say. I know for me, knowing my animals will be safe would be the most important thing. I hope Angel heals with you.
I’m so sorry.
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March 10, 2021 at 1:20 pm
rivkacymbalist
I’m so sorry for you loss! It is hard to lose your mother. Remember her well!
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March 10, 2021 at 1:23 pm
radfemspiraling
So very sorry to hear about your mother.
I am sure that she loved you very much, and I am sure that she was proud of you. Your words are a wonderful testament to her.
LikeLiked by 1 person