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Parents with Inconvenient Truth about Trans is a substack you should follow if you are interested in the pushback against transgender ideology and defending children from harm.
“If PITT readers each had a dollar for every time we’ve heard the much debunked, emotionally manipulative “live son or dead daughter” myth we’d all be very rich. We hear the “transition or die” trope from the media, schools, the government, misinformed family and friends, and from our own trans identified kids, who hear it themselves from the same sources as us and from fellow trans-identified peers in real life and on social media. I’ve heard it many times from Governor Spencer Cox of Utah, the state where I live. In February 2021 Governor Cox vetoed a bill that proposed to ban ‘transgender girls’ from participating in girls’ K-12 sports stating, “I don’t understand what they are going through or why they feel the way they do. But I want them to live… These kids are… they’re just trying to stay alive.”
A well-known purveyor of this harmful narrative is Diane Ehrensaft who is the chief psychologist at the UCSF Benioff Hospital Child and Adolescent Gender Clinic. In a widely circulated video of Dr. Ehrensaft giving a conference presentation she acknowledges that when children are given puberty blockers and cross-sex hormones as part of ‘gender affirming’ medical intervention, one side effect is infertility, and she wonders if children can really consent to this. She says, “The other issue that’s a showstopper now for many parents around giving consent to puberty blockers is the fertility issue. That if a child goes straight from puberty blockers directly to cross sex hormones they, at this point in history, they are pretty much forfeiting their fertility and so they will not have a genetically related child… The question is, can an 11-year-old, 12-year-old at that level of development, be really thinking and know what they want at age 30 around infertility?” Dr. Ehrensaft answers her own question by likening ‘gender affirming’ medical care to oncological care for children with cancer. “The answer to that is we don’t think twice about instituting treatments for cancers for children that will compromise their fertility. We don’t say, ‘We’re not going to give them the treatment for cancer because it’s going to compromise their fertility.’ For some youth, having the gender affirmation interventions is as life-saving as the oncology services for children who have cancer.”
Dr. Ehrensaft is, of course, insinuating that ‘gender affirming care’ is “life-saving” for children who identify as transgender because, if not affirmed, they might commit suicide. Her colleague, Joel Baum, states this more explicitly. “I’ll just add one thing here. When we’re working with families, what is the leverage point for that family?…The fact of the matter is at the end of the day, it is their decision and we just hope they’re going to make an informed decision. Just make sure you have all the information you need. Which includes, you can either have grandchildren or not have a kid anymore, because they’ve ended the relationship with you or in some cases because they’ve chosen a more dangerous path for themselves.”
Activists like Diane Ehrensaft peddle, and stooges like Governor Cox buy, the claim that ‘gender affirming care’ is like chemotherapy for cancer—life-saving and medically necessary. This is infuriating and deeply offensive to me because I am the mother of a trans-identified young adult daughter who thankfully seems to be desisting, and an older teenage son in active treatment for leukemia. Based on my son’s risk factors, his oncologist has given him an 85% chance of survival. His treatment is life-saving and medically necessary. Without it he would already be dead. The hard truth is that even with it he might still die. It is hyperbolic and shameful for anyone to conflate chemotherapy with ‘gender affirming care’, or to hold parents emotionally hostage with the words “transition or die”, “live son or dead daughter.”
It’s true that my daughter has been in great distress. She is a bright, socially awkward, mildly autistic girl with depression and generalized anxiety. But she is not going to die. In fact, how can she not be distressed when she has internalized what she’s heard repeatedly—that she one of the most marginalized, most oppressed, and most hated people on the face of the earth? That people are literally trying to erase her existence? That she must undergo extreme medical and surgical procedures and become a lifelong medical patient or she might kill herself? As she walks the road to desistance she told me recently that she believes she can relearn to love her body, but she is going to have to “unlearn a lot of stuff.”
Advocates of ‘gender affirming’ healthcare cite high suicide rates as evidence that medical and surgical intervention is “life-saving and medically necessary.” It goes without saying that every suicide is tragic, but there is no high-quality evidence to suggest that the often quoted overall attempted suicide rate of youth who identify as transgender is 41%. Dr. Laura Edwards-Leeper who is the Chair of the Child and Adolescent Committee for the World Professional Association for Transgender Health has stated, “As far as I know there are no studies that say that if we don’t start these kids immediately on hormones when they say they want them that they are going to commit suicide.. So that is misguided… in terms of needing to intervene medically to prevent suicide and doing it quickly. I know of no studies that have shown that.” There is also no evidence that medical transition decreases suicidality. In fact, one study showed that post transition adults were 4.9 times more likely to have made a suicide attempt and 19.1 times more likely to have died from suicide than the general population. No one is born in the wrong body. Our sex is written into the DNA of every cell of our body. People cannot change sex. It’s a serious thing to insinuate to someone that their healthy body is somehow wrong and might require extreme, irreversible cosmetic interventions to relieve mental distress. There is no right or wrong way to be a boy or a girl, a man or a woman.
Let me spell out for Diane Ehrensaft a few of the many reasons why it’s inaccurate to conflate cancer treatment and ‘gender affirming care.’ First, chemotherapy is given only after a confirmed diagnosis of cancer. We could not have brought our son to the hospital, declared he had cancer, and demanded chemotherapy. Demanding medication based on a self-diagnosis is something only my trans identified daughter could have done—because that only happens in gender clinics.
Second, pediatric cancer treatment is evidence-based. My son’s treatment plan was mapped out from the moment of his diagnosis based on exact protocols obtained over decades of research. It’s literally on a spreadsheet his medical team calls “the road map”. His hospital is part of a consortium of children’s hospitals that share data to further improve treatment and outcomes. ‘Gender affirming care’ is called the Wild West of healthcare for a reason. After a systematic review of the literature the countries of Finland, Sweden, the UK, and France, and the state of Florida have found the evidence for ‘gender affirming’ care to be of such low quality that they have abandoned the affirmative model of care. Even the much touted “gold standard” Dutch Protocol is now being discredited due to serious methodological flaws.
Third, outcomes for childhood cancers are well known, published, and updated. Post treatment my son will be followed for many years to assess his outcome. Outcomes for patients of ‘gender affirming care’ are mostly unknown. Clinics and providers rarely keep data and patients aren’t followed long enough to get reliable outcome information. Studies show that the average time to regret a gender transition is 8-10 years, but most patients are given follow up for much shorter times, if at all.
Finally, kids with cancer are given harsh, life-altering treatments because there is no other choice. Cancer treatment is truly life or death. ‘Gender affirming care’ however is iatrogenic, meaning that the treatment actually contributes to the condition. Eleven longitudinal studies have shown that, if just left alone, approximately 80% of dysphoric kids will simply outgrow the distress they feel and become comfortable with their bodies.
My family is very fortunate that childhood leukemia has a good prognosis, but the treatment is a grind. My son has faced his treatment with grace, good humor, and as much optimism as he can muster. One clinic day though my son just wasn’t having it. He was exhausted, nauseated, and facing a long day of treatment. When his nurse came in to get him ready for chemo he was sitting hunched over on the bed, hoodie pulled over his head, eyes closed, earbuds in. She asked him if he had done anything fun that week and he just rolled his eyes. Nurses work with these kids every day for their job but they don’t live the reality. It’s hard to do anything fun when you feel like crap.
After a few one-word responses from my son to her questions she asked him point blank “Are you having suicidal thoughts?” We felt ambushed by the question and I immediately jumped into the conversation. “Are you kidding me? Why would you ask him that?” She explained that per hospital protocol she has to ask that question monthly. “ Fine,” I said. “We get it. But please put the question in context.” My daughter announced her ‘transgender’ identity to us with the help of an adult my daughter felt she could trust. We all sat on the couch in our living room while this man called our daughter by the new name she had chosen and warned us of her “high suicide risk.” As shocked as I was I still remember thinking, “Why are you talking about suicide in front of her? She’s sitting right here!?!” I understand that one way to prevent suicide is to ask about it directly. I’m not discounting that. But why didn’t my son’s nurse say, “Look, I know things are really hard right now but it will get better. We’re here for you and are going to take very good care of you.” Why hasn’t anyone except PITT parents and allies thought to say these same words to trans identified kids? “Life is hard sometimes but you can get through this.” There are many detransitioners who have expressed that they wish someone had said these words to them.
Experts agree that suicide contagion is a risk. That’s why the media has strict guidelines in how they report suicide. It’s incomprehensible why all that goes out the window with ‘trans kids.’ Sociologist Michael Biggs highlighted this in a recent podcast interview. He stated that the “live daughter better than a dead son” rhetoric has been around for a long time, and that it is true that a large number of young people who identify as transgender claim that they’ve thought about or attempted suicide. Suicide and self-harm can be a real concern but, he explains, “…when you make suicidality a central part of the [trans] identity, that actually that sort of enhances the likelihood of making claims about suicide. Because ‘to be trans’ in some ways means ‘to be suicidal’ because ‘society is rejecting you’ or ‘your parents are rejecting you’. So it’s very important to actually know how many deaths result.” Data he obtained with a freedom of information request from the NHS in the UK showed 4 suicides out of 15,000 transgender identified individuals. That’s not 41%. I wonder if Utah Governor Cox would still think boys should be allowed to play in girls’ sports if he understood it’s really not a life-or-death situation.
PITT readers, we have to get this suicide myth stopped in its tracks. We must take back control of the narrative. Speak up and speak out whenever and wherever you can. Call out this emotional blackmail for what it is. Challenge your kid, your medical providers, your legislators, your schools, your friends, and your family. Debunk this untrue, harmful myth wherever it’s being perpetuated. “Transition or die” is one of the flimsiest reasons among a host of incredibly flimsy reasons for the chemical castration and genital mutilation of kids. Calling the suicide myth out for the harmful nonsense it is will help to bring an end to this horrible era of medical experimentation on kids. Proclaim the truth! We have live daughters and sons!!”
The CBC seems utterly transfixed (ha!) on erasing women from the public sphere. The CBC news headline from cbc.ca.
“YWCA Regina stands by trans woman giving keynote speech at [a Woman’s] award event amid backlash”
We are going to go through the article and highlight what the YWCA aka the Young Women’s Christian Association is saying in an attempt to normalize the notion that males who ‘identify’ as women are actually women as per the definition of women: Adult Human Females. Spoiler: The YWCA’s rationalization will go poorly if you happen to value truth and reality. Let’s dig in and enjoy what happens when organizations become ideologically captured by the cult of gender.
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“YWCA says feminist movement cannot evolve without inclusion of trans women”
Well, well, well.
It is nice they start off with the bullshit right off the top. What they have said here is that the feminist movement cannot evolve with the inclusion of adult human males. Isn’t obvious by now that females simply cannot have or run a movement without including men? It’s about time we evolved feminism by including and centring males within it. Nothing could go wrong…
“YWCA Regina is doubling down on its support of the transgender woman it chose to give the keynote speech at the 2023 Nutrien Women of Distinction Awards on May 6.
This comes after the speaker, Fae Johnstone, received significant backlash, transphobic remarks and threats after her attendance at the event was announced on April 21.”
Well of course they are ‘doubling down’. Dealing with recalcitrant females that object to a male colonizing and thus erasing females from society is definitely a clarion call to strengthen your resolve. For the benefit of the casual reader “transphobic remarks” encompass anything a gender ideologue doesn’t agree with.
“The announcement even resulted in calls from far right media to fire Johnstone, who is a high-profile trans activist and a YWCA Canada board member.”
According to most transactivists these days the far right includes anyone who doesn’t believe in their mystical beliefs. A quick quiz – can humans change their sex? If you answer “No”, the answer that comports with material reality we all share – welcome to the far right, you bigot.
“But Melissa Coomber-Bendtsen, CEO of YWCA Regina, said the organization supports Johnstone wholeheartedly.
“She’s an incredible community leader in our country [and] has done a huge amount of work with the federal government on gender and sexually diverse policy and framework,” Coomber-Bendsten said.
“YWCA Regina chose Fae as our keynote speaker because I think that given the current climate that we’re under, it was so important to have the perspective of trans women be given and be shared with our community and Regina.”
The gender cult makes the inroads it does because it manages to manipulate women into somehow believing that men who call themselves women actually are women. Usually the angle used is ‘gosh these poor gender confused males are obviously the most marginalized people to have ever existed, let’s shit on all feminism and centre these poor men in our movement’. It is a fucking sad state of affairs when it becomes okay to erase females and their accomplishments in society in the name of a ‘diverse and shared’ community.
“Johnstone said she wasn’t surprised by the attacks she received, but is still saddened”.
Good. Get used to it buddy. Women are fighting back against transgender ideology and female erasure in our society.
“The far right will zero in on us. They’ll talk about how we’re a threat to women and children. But feminist organizations all across Canada, every major feminist organization in this country, recognizes that there is no gender equity without trans women,” Johnstone said.”
No. People who comport with reality and respect female rights, boundaries, and safety will oppose what you are doing and what you support. People like WRN Canada.
Yeah, so again, its the guilt association. Disagreeing with male gender fantasy pretty much automatically makes you “far right”. By this definition, most of Canada is ‘far right’.
Also, I’m not really sure how including gender-confused men in female spaces, services, and sports leads to “gender equity”. What it actually leads to is males taking female spots in society and making actual females feel unsafe in formally single sex spaces. So no, lets take a large pass on any notion of ‘gender equity’ from this individual.
“Coomber-Bendsten said the transphobic reaction to Johnstone giving the keynote speech originally came from outside Regina, but was quickly picked up inside the community through social media, phone calls, emails and even people delivering handwritten letters to the YWCA.”
Women speaking about how inappropriate it is to have a man giving the keynote address at a female awards show is apparently ‘transphobic’. People calling you on your bullshit is what happens in a free society, and let me assure you, the bullshit is flowing hard and fast at the YWCA.
“She said many far right organizations believe trans women are detrimental to the feminist movement. But the YWCA and Johnstone disagree.”
The far right are certainly a powerful entity in Canadian society… (do keep in mind if you like to comport with reality and science this makes you irrecoverably ‘far right-wing’) or maybe just a fantastical construction designed to frighten people into silence about the gender cult. Because the gender cultists do not have arguments. Instead they have to threaten, bully, and intimidate those who would dare question their toxic ideology.
“Trans women experience significant gender inequity. We are more likely to live in poverty, more likely to experience hate, harassment and violence in our lives,” Johnstone said.”
Those with serious mental issues when it comes to dealing with reality and clinging delusions about themselves almost always have serious issues with state of and their place in society. We as a society should seek to get people with gender delusions the rational evidence based therapeutic help they need.
“So a feminist movement that is truly imagining a better world for everybody, one in which we have eradicated gender norms … it has to include transgender, diverse people because we often bear the brunt or significant volume of the hate.”
The misuse of feminist critique is off the charts here. Gender norms (aka gender) are a sets of ‘expected’ behaviours and norms that members of the respective sexes are supposed to follow to be a ‘normal’ male or female in society. These sex stereotypes hurt both women and men in society and their role in society should be diminished. Males and females should not face strictures for operating outside of the perceived gender norms.
Transgender ideology is the polar opposite of this notion. If your male child plays with dolls and is nurturing then by this ideology he needs to be ‘transitioned (put on off-label puberty blockers/cross-sex hormones/surgically mutilated and rendered infertile)’ into a woman. Transgender ideology and the cult of gender is actually reactionary as it seeks to codify the gender stereotypes of what being a male or female is.
Whereas, second wave feminists and many rational people would say people should adopt whichever stereotypes/behaviours they are comfortable with and be done with it. For example, if you are male and want to rock a dress or skirt, that all good. You are a male who likes wearing typically female clothing. All good. You be you, bro! What dress wearing doesn’t do, in any tangible way, is make you female.
“YWCA Regina serves two-spirit peoples, trans women, gender diverse and sexually diverse women in its shelters, programs, outreach and harm reduction work. Coomber-Bendsten said the staff is also diverse and includes transgender women.”
It’s okay to help other people out. It isn’t okay if you get sucked into their reality denying cult.
“We feel a big responsibility to make sure that we are answering that call to action to create an inclusive space in a more safe space. We’ve done a lot of work but, you know, acknowledging that we still have lots of work to do,” said Coomber-Bendtsen.
Bullshit. This is how Woke-Speak works. I will bet millions of dollars that their ‘inclusive space” does not include gender critical women (aka TERFS). The inclusion and safety comes to abrupt halt when you disagree with their gender magic and want to deal with material reality and evidence based arguments. Be aware of the double meanings when activists speak, because what they say and what they mean are almost always two different things.
“Johnstone said there is no way to advance feminism without recognizing that there is not just one definition of a woman and that women won’t always share the same experiences.”
Feminism has been doing just fine with centring females in its movements and actions in society. The only definition needed is this one: Woman = Adult human female.
“”I don’t have everything in common with women who aren’t trans, just like I, as a white woman, have a different experience of womanhood than a Black or Indigenous woman might. It’s not about a universal understanding of womanhood, it’s about dismantling the structures of violence and inequity that harm all of us,” said Johnstone.”
You have nothing in common with adult human females, as you are a man. Socialized as a man and raised as one. You can’t know what its like to be a woman because you are not one.
“While Johnstone is excited to give the keynote speech at the awards, she said she’s tired of the transphobic hate she receives. She said she has been targeted seven times in seven months by far right groups. Johnstone has received death threats and been encouraged to end her life.
“Trans people aren’t asking for much. We’re asking for human rights, dignity and equality,” said Johnstone.”
Trans human rights, dignity and equality is code for this:
A little more on Johnstone’s activism. His words speak for themselves –
Why not fund the Vancouver Rape Relief Shelter? It is exclusively a single sex shelter. Sorry raped women, your sanctuary just isn’t “inclusive” enough for Johnstone.
Johnstone’s “inclusivity” ends quite abruptly when when women start speaking about their rights, boundaries, and safety.
“Coomber-Bendtsen said many people believe that when people focus on including trans women and other marginalized communities, it takes away from their own needs.
“That couldn’t be further from the truth,” she said.
Coomber-Bendsten said that a lack of knowledge or understanding in the country does lead to a lack of empathy.
“It is that collective move forward with empathy and knowledge that is really going to bring change in our community.”
While there was vitriol and online attacks following the keynote announcement, YWCA Regina said it also received calls from people that wanted tickets to the event so they could understand more about trans women.”
What is actually stunning is the complete ideological capture of the YMCA. There is a stunning lack of empathy for women whose rights, boundaries, and safety have all been jeopardized and put at risk because of the inane desire to put males into female spaces. Empathy is not required in this situation. Just a large dose of commonsense and a return to respecting females in Canadian society.
Look at how the international YWCA versus the Canadian Branch defines itself. Guess which one retains the focus on females and their needs and which one has been corrupted by gender ideology.
– The Young Women’s Christian Association ( YWCA) is a nonprofit organization with a focus on empowerment, leadership, and rights of women, young women, and girls in more than 100 countries. The World office is currently based in Geneva, Switzerland, and the nonprofit is headquartered in Washington, DC.
– YWCA (Canada) – Canada is a leading voice for women, girls, Two-Spirit and gender diverse people. For 150 years, we’ve been at the forefront of a movement: to fight gender-based violence, build affordable housing and advocate for workplace equity.
I digress, but it is hard to miss when it is out in plain sight. Let’s finish the article.
“The 2023 Nutrien Women of Distinction Award will be held on May 6 at the GT Lounge. For the first time, this year’s event sold out within two days.
The YWCA said since receiving transphobic backlash, sponsors of the awards event have voiced their continued support.”
The 2023 Nutrien Women of Distinction Award will be distinct for a entirely different set of reasons than those intended. The distinction is highlighting the colonization of female spaces in society by gender confused males and erasure of females in Canadian society.
Free speech isn’t a tricky concept. It just needs to be applied universally and especially to the opinions and words of people you disagree with. Take some time and read the whole essay, it is worth your time.
“Another meme popular with the enemy is “calling bigotry an opinion is like calling arsenic a flavor”. Again, in plain English, “any opinion that I personally define as bigotry should not be tolerated”. To the jihadist or the Christian fundamentalist, any criticism or mockery of their own religion constitutes bigotry. And so it goes. The crux of the thing is who gets to define “bigotry” or whatever category of opinions is deemed intolerable and thus not protected free speech.
The people who make these kinds of assertions always assume that it is they, or people like them, who would have the power to define what is intolerant and thus intolerable. Don’t forget that in the near future it could be president DeSantis and a passel of legislators like Marjorie Taylor Greene who will be empowered to make that decision. The principle of free expression of opinion as an inviolable and seamless, yes, moral standard would stand robustly against them, because it would stand equally against any such attack regardless of which views are being suppressed. Once you decide certain opinions are worthy of suppression on whatever grounds, you have no principle to stand on when your opponents turn on you and try to suppress yours.”
How many times has it happened to you? The activist left often call this “flipping the script”.
Men’s rights activism whether happens to be wearing a dress or not, silences female voices.
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Mystro
The Arbourist
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