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The DWR Sunday Religious Disservice – How to Write Religious Texts

March 17, 2019 in Religion | Tags: Holy Texts, Religion, The DWR Sunday Religious Disservice

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5 comments

March 17, 2019 at 10:24 am

Jeus

You silly humans wrote your own crazy story by means of your own corruption, lies and savage ambitions which has produced a world of tyranny, exploitation and war.

The Word doesn’t say you will be condemned if you don’t believe in some man-made doctrine. It says you will be condemned if you don’t believe you will be held accountable for what you do. (The universe, which is made of truth, is inexorable on all its accounts.)

It says all the people’s rotten actions will be exposed on the Judgment Day.

It says: people will be condemned by their own fierce judgments; they will have it meted out to them as they have meted it out to others; they will be shown the mercy they have shown to others. (What you do unto the least of my sisters and brothers you do unto me!)

When people are exposed it will be like they are thrown into a fiery furnace of burning shame. (There will be crying and gnashing of teeth.) And the smoke from the fire that burns them may go up for ever. (Some people are in danger of receiving the Mark of Cain. It means they will carry around the rotten things they did in this place forever.)

People of patriarchal races have savage instincts. Junk DNA. Selfish Genes run amok. Your history — your world at present — is filled to the brim and overflowing with brutality.

But God did not make you the way you are. You made yourselves. You go deeper and deeper into the tree of knowledge and continue to choose lies and corruption over truth and civilization.

“By the sympathy of your human hearts for sin, ye shall scent out all the places — whether in church, bed-chamber, street, field, or forest — where crime has been committed, and shall exult to behold the whole earth one stain of guilt, one mighty blood-spot.

“Far more than this! It shall be yours to penetrate, in every bosom, the deep mystery of sin, the fountain of all wicked arts, and which inexhaustibly supplies more evil impulses than human power — than my power, at its utmost! — can make manifest in deeds.”

“Lo! there ye stand, my children,” said the figure, in a deep and solemn tone, almost sad, with its despairing awfulness, as if his once angelic nature could yet mourn for our miserable race. “Depending upon one another’s hearts, ye had still hoped that virtue were not all a dream! Now are ye undeceived! — Evil is the nature of mankind. Evil must be your only happiness. Welcome, again, my children, to the communion of your race!”

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March 17, 2019 at 10:59 am

Carmen

I take it Jeus is a keyboard-savvy robot. (And not a silly human)
Or is it the same guy from the other day who forgot an ‘s’?

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March 17, 2019 at 1:04 pm

Jesus

Oops, typo. We all make mistakes. Even those who exist in the Light of the Above.

And, of course, I came in human form. “Just a slob like one of us.”

You should see that one time I got drunk and raised Lazarus from the dead! I’M supposed to be the First Raised From the Dead! (The galactic continuum of transcendent civilizations has the technology!)

It was a huge fuck-up! But it all worked out. After all, the true meaning of anything goes deeper than the literal.

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March 17, 2019 at 2:44 pm

Carmen

*she clears throat*. . . Speaking of fuck-ups . . .

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March 18, 2019 at 1:11 pm

Jesus

Yes speaking of… The reason your world is a racist concentration-camp that keeps People of Color under the boot of oppression across the world – from Big-City-Liberal inner-city ghettos to free-trade shanty towns – is because of all the fuck-ups in high places.

They believe good leadership and management is raping and pillaging the globe!

They are crazy like a wolf:

Oops, didn’t mean to bomb those weddings! (Even though ISAT could see the whites of their eyes.)

Oops, didn’t mean to lock up tens of thousands of “super predators” in private-prison sweatshops! (Might as well keep ’em in there…)

Oops, didn’t meant to deregulate the banks allowing all manner of banker to defraud home-owners, taxpayers and investors out of trillions of dollars! (Might as well let them loot the Federal Reserve treasury of a couple trillion MOAR!)

None of these Good People would dare to speak offensive language in public. Imagine the horror!

(Salty language is certainly low class. But anyone who knows the Word knows the last will be first and the first will be last!)

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