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A Man on Transitioning – Excerpts from When the Shoe Doesn’t Fit
February 8, 2018 in Gender Issues | Tags: Gender, Men, Socialization, transitioning, what it is like to be a woman | by The Arbourist | Comments closed
Go read this post in full, very well worth your time.
Some thoughts from a man who underwent transition to ‘become a woman’.
“Jesse, a man who once claimed to be a woman, would agree with this. Like Cari, he also found that transitioning did not meet expectations. Jesse concedes that “I’m never going to truly know what it’s like to be a woman”. He bravely states,
It’s bending biological facts out of recognition if you try to make ‘female’ into some flexible category that anyone can fit into, just ’cause they feel that way inside. It’s also truly insulting. If you do that, you’re saying the oppression of women isn’t a thing at all, because anyone can be a woman; anyone can opt in and out.
He also talks about the women he met while identifying as one himself.
They were great people. They were generous, and kind, and accepting. But you know why? Because women have been told they have to be that way, ever since they were little girls and someone tells them to share, and to not be unladylike, and to be polite and not be loud or difficult.
He then advises boys and men considering transition:
You want to act like a woman? Start by being a decent human. Respect people’s boundaries. Respect their need for space and their experience of oppression, which you will never truly understand. Yes, trans people are an oppressed minority, and yes, the prejudice you’ve experienced overlaps in some ways with the way our culture treats women, but it is not the same, and please get it out of your head that it’s worse.
Julie Burchill adds that:
In a world where millions of people, especially ‘cis-gendered’ women, are not free to choose who they marry, what they eat or whether or not their genitals are cut off and sewn up with barbed wire when they are still babies, “choosing your gender” is uniquely for the privileged.”
More stories like this need to hit the mainstream consciousness. People should know that ‘transitioning’ isn’t some sort of magic bullet that solves the gender problem.
Your opinions…