You are currently browsing the tag archive for the ‘Socialization’ tag.

   Go read this post in full, very well worth your time.

Some thoughts from a man who underwent transition to ‘become a woman’.

 

“Jesse, a man who once claimed to be a woman, would agree with this. Like Cari, he also found that transitioning did not meet expectations. Jesse concedes that “I’m never going to truly know what it’s like to be a woman”. He bravely states,

It’s bending biological facts out of recognition if you try to make ‘female’ into some flexible category that anyone can fit into, just ’cause they feel that way inside. It’s also truly insulting. If you do that, you’re saying the oppression of women isn’t a thing at all, because anyone can be a woman; anyone can opt in and out.

He also talks about the women he met while identifying as one himself.

They were great people. They were generous, and kind, and accepting. But you know why? Because women have been told they have to be that way, ever since they were little girls and someone tells them to share, and to not be unladylike, and to be polite and not be loud or difficult.

He then advises boys and men considering transition:

You want to act like a woman? Start by being a decent human. Respect people’s boundaries. Respect their need for space and their experience of oppression, which you will never truly understand. Yes, trans people are an oppressed minority, and yes, the prejudice you’ve experienced overlaps in some ways with the way our culture treats women, but it is not the same, and please get it out of your head that it’s worse.

Julie Burchill adds that:

In a world where millions of people, especially ‘cis-gendered’ women, are not free to choose who they marry, what they eat or whether or not their genitals are cut off and sewn up with barbed wire when they are still babies, “choosing your gender” is uniquely for the privileged.”

More stories like this need to hit the mainstream consciousness. People should know that ‘transitioning’ isn’t some sort of magic bullet that solves the gender problem.

genderpyramid   It is evident that Auntie Wanda has thought a fair amount on gender and how it is constructed in society.

It’s [sex and gender] really not that esoteric:

A girl is a prepubescent to adolescent human female. A woman is a post-adolescent human female. A boy is a prepubescent to adolescent human male. A man is a post- adolescent human male.

Gender is the socially enforced prescribed behaviors and expectations people are pressured to follow based on which sex they are. It’s profoundly harmful and, especially for girls and women, oppressive.

“Gender identity” is therefore associating oneself with the oppressive gender roles of the opposite sex and determining that makes one the equivalent of the opposite sex (or in some way something other than the sex they are), which only reinforces the idea that gender roles are inherent to the sexes, which only furthers their oppressive use on the sexes.

That’s it really.

 

Can you explain it a little differently? I’m really tired and frustrated at the moment, please just make it a little more simple if that’s okay?

 

   “Okay, consider it this way: you’re born female, you’re a girl. You’re born male, you’re a boy. That in of itself is a neutral statement.

But in our society there are certain things expected of girls that aren’t expected of boys. We’re expected to be quieter, more agreeable, less capable, less competent, less intelligent than boys.

We’re expected to like makeup and fashion and princesses and we’re also treated as vain and frivolous and less worthy for liking these things.

If we like “boy” things that may be seen as quirky and charming for a while, but it’s still discouraged and we’re still expected to grow out of it.

We’re expected to be disinterested in science, engineering and technology, discouraged from purusing it if we are interested and treated as less competent if we make it our career in adulthood.

(Even though a scant few decades ago women primarily did the mathematical calculations for NASA and preformed the earliest computer programming. Because those things, like typing, were seen as jobs that were beneath men to do.)

We’re expected to be sexually appealing to every man on the street. This is the role given to us in most advertising, film and media by default.

We’re expected to grow up to be the helpers of men, to be their wives and girlfriends and the things they get sex from. To further their own needs and ambitions while having none of our own.

That’s gender. It’s sexist. And it sucks.”

[Source:Not Your Safe Space]

What we are exposed to in childhood helps set the tone of our expectations later in life.  Consider the female role models little girls and boys are exposed to while they are making up their minds on what and how they want to be.

sleepingb1

-Woman Hating.  Andrea Dworkin

     Contrast this passage with male role models who are actively adventuring, swashbuckling, and generally getting shit done.  The gender roles and socialization are woven deeply into every aspect of our society.  Gender roles are for the most part, destructive social constructs, whose expectations and limitations hurt women and men.  We should strive to counter the normative messages that our socialization breeds into us because ultimately, gender is a hierarchy that happens to discriminate against half the human race and we need less oppression not more in our society.

Tatsuya Ishida creates the internet comic Sinfest.  Sometimes his insight hits the proverbial nail on the head.

 

sinfestill8

gn1 gn2 gn3
-Allan Johnson on compulsory femininity
(the systematic expectations and goals of female socialization)

The Gender Knot

 

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